Out of the mouths of kids...

Just some Ana-isms here.

So today, as usual, I picked up the kids from school.  Also as usual, I have them all as we sit and wait for Nick to get out... and as usual, there is a certain amount of chatter going on... chatter that I tend to overhear.

Today... no exception.

SO... we're sitting there waiting and I hear from the back seat Lyndsey laughing, laughing and telling Ana, "that's not how it goes Ana!"  Then Ana sez something that I can't exactly (or remotely) make out.  Then I hear Rachael and Jake laughing along with Lyndsey and all of them saying, "That's not how it goes!"

So for as long as I can remember, the Empire carpet commercial has been somewhat of a staple on the radio and television..  Also in that same genre is the Luna carpet company.  So we have 588-2300 Empirrrrre and 773-202-Lunaaaaaa. I know that Luna has (for some reason) changed their number... I only know this because I saw a commercial on TV recently and the number was not the 773-202-luna anymore... least not on that commercial.

After some more chatter and laughing I finally am able to zero in on what all the chortling back there is all about.

Seems Ana was reciting the old commercial... 'cept her version was 773-202-tuna.  So she was saying, "773-202-tunaaaaa."

Then the second one of the day for her (she's on a roll here) came this evening.

I'm not perfectly clear of all the details, but it involved Ana "tattling" on Rachael.  For some reason Rachael was spraying the Simple Green cleaner mix into the air.  Ana proceeded to tell Julie that she was spraying it.  Julie said something along the line that she shouldn't be spraying chemicals in the air.

Shortly after that, Ana comes to see me in the other room and she's recounting the story to me and she tells me that, "Rachael shouldn't be spraying mechanicals in the air."

Just thought I'd share...

KEIYH

Overheard

Just wanted to share with you a little as to the goings on around here.

As an added bonus we have Ana's portrayal of the (chocolate) Joker.  The kids love Eggo (buttermilk) waffles.  There is also an affection for Nutella... for those who don't know, it's a chocolate hazelnut spread.  They will put it on toast and waffles.  Now the waffles get eaten somewhat akin to the way you'd eat a piece of toast.  That is to say that they hold in their hand and take a bite.  For some odd reason, our kids love to eat right down the middle and in doing so, at some point the waffle then will be hitting their cheeks... and in Ana's case leaving two chocolate streaks/lines on both sides of her mouth leaving her looking very much like the Joker.

For the "main event"

So tonight, I overheard this little exchange in the bathroom as the kids were getting ready for bed.

Nick - "Awwww, something smells like butt!"
Rachael - "It's either my socks, or Lyndsey been in here too long."

Nick then picks a sock out of the hamper and proclaims, "It's your socks!"

Lyndsey's reputation remains (for now) intact.

KEIYH

The proud owners of another 8 year old

So another month, another birthday...

Seems in this house we're celebrating a birthday almost every month... then again, there's good reason for that because we almost do.

So Rachael joins the ranks of 8yr olds past and present.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RACHAEL!

I had written something last night, and thought that it posted... shows what happens when I think. For some reason, it not only didn't post, it didn't even auto save itself in draft either. I know... a pity party cuz I have to start all over.

So what does it say when your child (and children) ask for things like Gold Fish, Sour Cream and Onion Pringles, Orange Tic Tacs, M&Ms, Cheetos and Oreos? That's right, this was her list, not inclusive, but most of it.

I'm saving the best for last... the Pièce de résistance... at the encouragement of her brother (that being brother Jake) she had on her list Sweet Baby Ray's Hickory Brown Sugar BBQ sauce.

Only in my house would BBQ sauce even be spoken in the same breath w/birthday present! She got most everything on the list AND some new clothes.


KEIYH

KEIYH

Red one… Black one… Yellow one…

Thanks a lot Volkswagen.   Actually… thanks a lot Volkswagen marketing people.

(For as much as I’m a comedian, Jake is following in my comedic footsteps)

Exhibit A:

Every morning as I take the kids to school I hear Black one… Blue one… and so on.  Today was no different… except one thing caught my ear as we rolled along.  Oh, I’m used to hearing, “that’s not a Volkswagen Lyndsey” or “that’s not a Volkswagen Rachael that’s a Toyota” or the inevitable “where?” followed by, “right over there” or “it passed us already.”  No, I’m used to all that.  What caught my ear today was hearing Jake say “Turquoise one… actually it’s more of an Aqua.”

What’s next?

“Green one… no… actually it’s more of a Pine Forest Green”

Exhibit B:

Lyndsey started kindergarten this year and it is customary in the K class (we’ve been through it enough times) that they have a week or so of wearing color clothes.  That is to say that Monday is Red day and Tuesday is Brown day and so on.  Well that came to a close culminating in Black and White day yesterday, so today was wear whatever you want day… in other words no specific color needed to be worn. 

As we’re getting ready to go this morning, Jake is sitting in the family room (as am I) and I’m waiting on Lyndsey to get her socks and shoes on so that I can tie them… it is gym day after all.  Anyway, she comes in wearing a sun dress that is a rather bright yellow/lime green kind of color… almost looking florescent.  As she walks in, Jake says semi under his breath, “I wonder if it’s highlighter day?"

KEIYH

Happy

Birthday...

Happy 12th Birthday Nick...

Splish Splash

Picture if you will a house... a house that was built in 1889.  A house that was built with the finest construction ingredients of its day.  Plaster walls, hardwood floors, limestone foundation... clapboard siding.  Not just any house built in 1889 mind you, but the one that rested at 621 Western.

Ahhhh...

That's right... 621, that's what the number used to be that hung over the door.  I'm thinking that they changed it to 605 to remove any bad juju... it's not working.

So... 4:30 in the AM... I wake up to some thunder and lightening, oh and rain too.  I figure... well, now that I'm awake, I may as well hop on the old computer to check the radar and see how much rain we were in for I mean at that time, it didn't seem like it was coming down too heavy... but first a trip to the turlet.

Okay, let's have a look see...  Boy... that's a lot of dark green out there... and some yellow and orange and red.  Man... that's a lot of rain headed this way... nothing I can do about it and I'm certainly not going to be getting up now with only being 4:45am and all.  Close the lid on the computer and settle back in to cop a couple more hours of some zzzz's.

One bright lightening flash and (nearly simultaneous) sonic boom later and it's lights out... as in no power.

Fast forward to a little before 7am and still no power.  Need to get the kids up soon as they all have a date with the dentist.  Julie goes off to work a couple of hours and calls me to ask if I've been in the basement yet.

I have not.

I think you can see where this was headed with the title.  I open the door to the basement (and it's dark down there... still without power) but I can see that the cat carrier that is down there has floated over to the bottom of the stairs.  This also meant that the cat boxes and plastic totes were either floating too, or had capsized and taken on water... so much for plastic totes.

DAMN!

Okay kids let's finish up and make sure that we're ready by 9:30... that's when Julie was coming home to pick us up.

Power comes back on at 9:00... so it's been out for like 4 hours.  Now I have light and can make my way down to assess the mess/fallout of that charming limestone basement turned marina with all the floating things.  So 5" of rain and no power for 4 hours can make an awful mess.  In all the years that we've lived here and the multiple times that the basement has flooded, this is the most water we've taken on.

So signing off now (after letting the pump do it's thing for a while) to go down and clean up the marina... I mean basement.

Where's my snorkel?

KEIYH

Don't hold back...

So earlier today, we're all getting ready to meet up with Julie's mom and sister (who's in town) for dinner.  After I got out of the shower and was getting my sandals on, I had called for Julie to see where she was and if we were ready to go... so I called out for her.  Ana was standing at my side (waiting for help getting her sandals on) and she chimed in with, "I hate when you call Jeff and Julie... it's so annoying!"

KEIYH

Slipping to the equator

The Chicagoland area is the new equator complete with torrential tropical downpours everyday now.

So there's yesterday... I know there's always a yesterday, but this particular yesterday was yesterday! With it came yet more rain in the morning... the radar image looking all green infused with all that yellow and red... so colorful. Then that passed and we had sun... and one of the "benefits" of summer in in this area... sun and "steam"... that feeling like when you walk out your door you're walking right into a sauna.

Then as the day wore on and early evening approached, so did some more clouds and those clouds were yet again making the radar look all pretty like with the reds and yellows. With the approaching storm moving rather quickly our way, I decided that I better get the grill going and beat the rain. Julie was going out to dinner so it was me and the kids. Julie left and no sooner did she leave, the power went out. I suppose it was in anticipation of the approaching storm as the wind, the darkness and the rain were still off to the west and it was merely cloudy overhead.

I hear rumbling... and it's not my tummy, so lemme reach over here and turn up the heat a little. Cook damn you! SIZZLE went the food! Drip... drip... No, that's not my kids pointing to me saying drip, it's the start of the rain. Luckily my master plan of turning up the heat on the food worked and it was done. I turned the grill off and made a hasty retreat into the darkness and humidness that was now inside. I needed to find a candle or two. I had a thought run through my head as I lit them... I'm adding to the heat inside by having an open flame, or flames. Well at least it was a dry heat.

An aside here... when the power went out, there was much "woo hooing" by the kids. That "woo hoo" waned as time passed and we were still in the dark and without any kind of air processing equipment. Then it became, "when's the power coming back on?"

The power did come back on a little after 8pm... to much cheering and rejoicing. That elation faded when I told the boys to take care of the cat boxes in the basement. They went down and came back up saying the basement has water.

ARGG!

I went down and sure enough we had some very minor flooding. Once the power came back, it took the pump only 15 minutes to pump the floor "dry".

But wait... what's with all these flying bugs around the light fixture and where the hell did they come from?

Seems along with the "beauty" of having a limestone foundation, there comes a certain porosity that is part and parcel. It's this inherent porosity that allowed an ant colony to escape their colony and seek drier ground. HA! Joke's on them, I had water in my basement!

Anyway, the swarm of bugs flying around the light fixture were indeed winged ants... and to the right of me, covering the wall that faces the front of the house, were the wingless brethren.

Sorry, no pictures...

After about an hour of combat (and some mopping) said ants are resting comfortably inside my shop vac. Time to finish the rest of the small clean up. "Oh boys!"

KEIYH

Chaperon Extraodinare?

So the field trip went on as planned in spite of the threat of some ugly and wet weather. The day certainly was starting out to be questionable indeed, at least as far as I was concerned.

There were four class rooms going on the trip... two third grade and two fourth grade. I find out that one of the teachers is out because she's got jury duty and she's the person of contact for the trip and that another is out sick. Then Jake's teacher is telling me that there's a chance that myself and the other chaperon could be left to ourselves because there is a student that sometimes requires special care/attention due to a condition. Running through my mind... let's hope that doesn't happen... not only for my sake, but for the student's as well.

I cautiously make my way towards the class room door and everyone just looks... and I suspect wonder... who's the big guy with the buzzed head and the long white chin spinach and the "weird" eye and the skeleton (Jack Skellington) sweatshirt?

"Are you Jakob's dad"? "Yup..." One girl came to me and introduced herself and told me that she was Jake's BFF. I then had another come to me and tell me that she was Jake's secret admirer.

Then it was where are the buses? When are they supposed to be here? Are they coming round back or in the front? It was semi-chaotic. They (the buses) did arrive on time and their arrival marked a trip to sending everyone to the bathroom and out to load up.

By the time that everyone was loaded up and we were ready to roll, it had become quite steamy, in the bus, so windows started to open... which was alright until we started the actual rolling. It started to raining fairly hard and it started coming in the bus... alas, we had to close them for fear of drowning.

Okay, windows up, getting steamy again and it's pouring outside but at least we're on our way... just as soon as we cross the train tracks, the tracks with the train blocking the road.

As you might suspect... it's been a great number of years since I've been on a school bus. Good to know that with all the advances we've made in the auto industry over the last 30ish years that buses have managed to steer clear of it. Oh, the seats are different from what I remember, but the ride's still the same. I also remember a day that the driver actually had to pull/push a handle/lever to open and close the bus door now it's a button. Ahhh... there's the technology.

Luckily the rain subsided before we got to our destination... Naper Settlement.

Our first stop was the one room schoolhouse. The "teacher" never broke from character. It was good too since she made the kids form two lines... boys and girls. She also made them curtsy and bow. Girls were granted entrance first followed by the boys. I heard a number of the boys grumbling why they had to wait for the girls. Didn't have the heart to tell them that they better get used to it.

Once in the room with the girls on one side and the boys on the other... with each desk having a slate, piece of chalk and a book from which we were all made to read a verse. First was the girls and then the boys.

It was explained to us, before we headed on in, that in the school house there was 1st through 8th grade in there and the teacher had to teach to all grade levels. Though perhaps big for my age, I (along with the other chaperons and teachers) were told that we were the 8th graders... little did she know that's about as far as I've advanced... educationally that is.

All in all, the trip was good and if the kids paid attention, they might've actually learned something along the way. I did. It's that 8th grade education put into action. One little quick tidbit I will share is that back in the day, you had to pay to get your mail, not pay to send it like we do today and that it cost $.25 for a single piece of paper. She went on to explain that for every additional sheet, it was $.25. She then asked the kids what it would cost to send three... "$.75" Four? "$1.00" Five? A momentary pause... "$1.25" She then asked if they thought that was a lot of money to send five sheets? Most kids said no. She then proceeded to tell them that at that time, you could get an acre of land for a $1.25.

She also talked about how people would get creative in order to save money. They would write a letter top to bottom and then turn the paper 90 degrees and write over what they had already written. Then they started to write top to bottom and then rotate the paper 180 degrees and continue by writing "in between the lines" so as to use all the space on the paper. This is where the phrase reading between the lines came from.

She also talked about how a quarter became a quarter. Back in that time, they had silver dollars (that incidentally were made in Mexico) that they would cut into quarters... they didn't have multiple coins back then as we do today, so they would literally use a quarter of the silver dollar. So a quarter in that day was actually a pie shape.

She continued to tell how if you cut the quarter in half, you'd have 12.5 cents. Then the dollar would be in eighths... hence the term "piece of eight". Also, she said (I think) that an 1/8 was also a bit... either that or it was 1/16. I can't imagine cutting a silver dollar into 16 pieces. AND... you could cut the coins yourself. They did have a system in place where it was done by weight.

Pretty fascinating stuff.

Well... that's it for now, I've done my "educational duty" for the day.

KEIYH

In other news...

Today is the beginning of the last single digit year for Jake. Allow me to remove any caused confusion... he is 9 today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAKE!

To celebrate... I'm chaperoning his field trip tomorrow. I think that he's pretty psyched as he's brought it up multiple times this week. Hopefully it won't rain all day long as a good portion of it (the day) will be spent outside.

Not to be left out...

Congratulations to Nick, he's first chair clarinet!

KEIYH

Restless mundaneness...

So April is behind us and May is here... so...

It's 80 days since our lives were forever altered... the (Webster's liberties again -->) unfillable void. I don't want anyone to think that I'm just sitting on that number knowing exactly how many days... I had to stop and add it up/count it out on a calendar. I will be sad (if I'm still walking this Earth... hey, one never knows) when the day comes that the days that she's gone exceed the days that she was here.

May will be a busy month for us as we were accepted to Camp Sunshine's family bereavement weekend. Camp Sunshine is a camp for kids that have life threatening conditions. We had talked about sending Emmah there, but she really enjoyed Camp Quality and well... Camp Quality was about a 1,000 miles closer (Frankfort) than Camp Sunshine (Maine) but that's where we'll be headed via Niagara Falls.

So it's bittersweet that we will be heading out there without her... well at least without her physical in the flesh presence. In a way looking forward to the trek out there as we will be traveling uncharted roads through middle Michigan, Ontario Canada with a stop to see Niagara Falls. Then on through (kind of) upstate New York, Vermont, New Hampshire and finally on into Maine. I'm the only one to have been to the falls, but it was somewhere around the turn of the century, so it will be like new for me too. If only we didn't have that empty seat in the truck.

I've decided that I will no longer be sharing beverages with my children. I now have a cold and am not happy about it. Hopefully it will be gone by the time we need to depart.

In addition to the Maine trip, Nick has the band trip coming up. Lyndsey is graduating. Jake's birthday and Mother's Day. Julie's mom's birthday and two field trips for Jake help to fill up and round out the month.

For those wondering, Jake's burn is healing up just fine.

KEIYH

Sorry, no salad pictures...

What started out as a few smaller blisters became (overnight) one small water balloon on Jake's wrist. If he rolls his wrist over and back, the fluid rolls back and forth like the tide.

KEIYH

Pointless rambling...

Keep it up Bansemer and the only #2 you'll be doing here (if ever) will be in a hole dug for you in the middle of my yard... okay... you got me, I wouldn't want to mar up my lawn by digging a hole in the middle of it. So maybe behind the garage and no we won't want to be seeing your x+5 at that time either!

Why is it that you prep the area by loosening the soil, spread the seed and water with religion and it doesn't grow, but the stray seeds that land in places that you don't want grass (like in the flower beds, or cracks in the sidewalk) grow just fine w/out any attention at all?

I also think that we need to start a program for helping/teaching squirrels how to cross the street. You ever really watch them? They run to the middle, stop, turn back half way, stop, turn around and go the way they started, stop then continue. It all starts in the home...

How unlucky do you have to be to be the State Trooper that draws the keys to the trooper mini-van? I saw three troopers driving (in a row) first and third one in a regular car, the guy in the middle in the van. I mean I've seen trooper cars parked in some driveways around here... how'd you like to be the guy with the trooper mini-van parked in your drive? What's the mini-van gonna chase down... mopeds?

I've decided that most of my children would perish if they were prey in the wild as they seemingly can't walk let alone flee a predator. They fall at random for no apparent reason.

When did fiber, or as it used to be called back in the day (at least in my house) roughage, become one of the basic food groups?

And to wrap all this pointlessness with something meaningful...

Not cool, but hot!

Jake had a hankerin' for some jell-o with dinner and volunteered to make it, but in the end had to settle for being made a salad.

We have a water cooler, have had it for years... we just like to hang around it and talk... anyhow, this cooler also heats water. For many years we used it mostly for making tea and jell-o... and more recently warm-hot cocoa - don't ask.

As mentioned, Jake wanted to make some jell-o. He got the measuring cup and proceeded to fill it with hot water, then somehow proceeded to pour about two cups all over himself... his left hand/wrist taking the brunt of the burnt. He's got a ring of blisters around his wrist.

So after running it under cold water and then having him soak it in a bowl of cold water until you could wring out his hand... to help soothe the burning we read that cucumber gel (or aloe gel) would ease the pain. Not having any cucumber gel (nor aloe gel) on hand, Julie sliced up some cucumber and we placed slices on his wrist and arm... thus making Jake a "salad". He's doing fine.

And lastly (and certainly not leastly) congratulations to Lynn Pettus for her Boston Marathon accomplishment. If you don't know who she is, then you're not reading "113 for Emmah"... for shame!

KEIYH

Diggin' the weather

Diggin' weeds...

Diggin' to plant flowers

Diggin' to plant some veggies

Diggin' to "plant" a cat

Huh?

Not totally lost in the backwash of losing Emmah, but when we were in the hospital (Jan. 23rd to be exact) we had an old cat pass... he was 18. We wanted to bury him.

In addition to the ground being frozen and given the current circumstances at the time, he spent time chilled/chillin' in a cardboard box in the garage. That was all well and good as long as it was cold outside. At one point between then and now, we had a warm spell and we thought that we really need to get him out of the garage and in the ground, but then it got cold again... then warm again. It was around this time that I noticed that the cardboard was looking a little suspect thus thinking that it be a good idea to put the box in a plastic bag as the ground still wasn't in a condition to dig. So he sat out on the deck, in a box, in a bag, under a board to keep the bag weighed down and closed.

Finally after much talking about having to get him in the ground, we finally did yesterday. I de-sodded a portion of the backyard and dug a hole and slipped him in... and not a moment too soon either. He was beginning to smell a little "road killish" as he basked in the the sun in the (black) plastic bag in the box. The kids placed flowers on top of the box (no doubt to make it smell better in there) and so that was that.

Lesson learned with Ana... when she comes in and is standing in the bathroom door saying that she "has to go pee" and you say go ahead and then she hangs her head... that's an indication that the said peeing has taken place.

Why is it that kids (95% of the time) will do the exact opposite of what is required in a given situation? That or do the one thing that you don't want them to do. It's instinctive I think... I mean it happens too often to be coincidence. Take Wednesday for example... we (Ana, Lyndsey and I) were walking home after Lyndsey got out of school. It's a short walk and the day was really nice. As we walk along the sidewalk, they (Ana and Lyndsey) walk very briskly/quickly, but when it comes to crossing the couple of streets that we need to cross, they suddenly become the "old man" character (Tim Conway on the Carol Burnett Show) and shuffle along. AND Take yesterday for example. Some years back, we had a large cottonwood tree removed from our front yard. Over the years as the remaining stump has decayed (underground) it creates sink holes. I've filled it several time over the years and yesterday was such a day... with there being some extra dirt from the burial, I threw it in the "hole". I watered it in to help it along to settle. I had come across an abandoned snail shell when digging and gave it to Jake. He wanted to show it to Julie who happened to be planting some plants in a container by the front walk. Jake started to run towards the front. Now he has all kinds of space and room to run and can take any path to the front. What does he choose? Right through the dirt/mud.

This JUST in... toilet water is cold. How do I know? Lyndsey just told me. She needed to go and so (it appeared to me) there was some leftovers from Ana in there and so Lyndsey flushed and sat down. I then hear a (literal) cry from the bathroom... "DAD... the toilet is overflowing... and it's cold." I told her to get off... "I can't!" "Well, I can't fix it with you sitting on it!" Luckily the towel/rag that I had on the floor to sop up Ana's pee was still sitting on the floor. That kept the "spillage" (whatever wasn't hitting Lyndsey's bottom) to a minimum

I have nothing to fear about being institutionalized when I get old... see I'm living that way already. When (and if) that day should arrive, I'll know just what to do!

KEIYH

Looking for a good stock tip?

Invest in the companies that manufacture bubbles.

The Easter Bunny sees fit to annually leave bubbles at our house... there is a less than family friendly/safe joke about blowing bubbles as a kid and a man named bubbles... that's as far as I'm going with it. At any rate, this year he left bubble machines too... two gun type (one for Jake and one for Rachael) and two stand alone, set it down and turn it on type... one each for Lyndsey and Ana. Since we were at a brunch yesterday, that by the time we returned home it was raining, the kids didn't get to try out the new bubble gizmos. I sent them outside after lunch today with gizmos and bottles of bubbles in tow to "go out and play" with. They did Lawerence Welk proud out there.

We'll uh... pretty much be making our own when we run out. I figure that will be the next time they decide to bubble up out there.

KEIYH

Missing Emmah...

Sometimes the emptiness is able to be kept in check... other times, not so much. Sometimes there's a trigger, other times not sure what brings it on. Only know that (I suspect) this is going to be the way it goes for an undetermined amount of time going forward.

I'm reminded of some lines/lyrics from the song Hole Hearted...

Life's ambition occupies my time

Priorities confuse the mind

Happiness one step behind

This inner peace I've yet to find

If I'm not blind why can't I see

That a circle can't fit

Where a square should be

There's a hole in my heart

That can only be filled by you

And this hole in my heart

Can't be filled with the things I do

This heart of stone is where I hide

Day by day less satisfied

Should have known from the start

I'd fall short with the things that I do

(for those that know or are familiar with the song, I've used lines that feel appropriate)

I know that I said that the feelings will last for an undetermined amount of time, but I think (in truth) it will be more like the tide... never ending and ever changing pending where I am on the beach. If I'm high enough up the beach, it never reaches me and that's okay... I know it's there and always will be. Then there are the days that I'm a little further down walking close, right at the edge and it touches and washes over my feet allowing me to feel it's chill/coldness. Then there days like today where I'm buried up to my neck at low tide and high tide rolls on in and I'm drowning in it as it consumes me.

There's a hole in my heart that can only be filled by you Emmah...

On a lighter note... the kids were out riding their bikes today. Ana on her trike, Lyndsey on her two wheeler (with training wheels) both bikes still having that new bike smell as they were Christmas gifts from Santa. Not to be left out Rachael shows up with her bike followed by the boys shortly after that... the boys looking for any excuse to get out of the torturous yard work I was imposing on them... not being done be damned.

Now Rachael feeling lucky... or ambitious... or both (or just plain crazy) requested to Julie that she wanted her training wheels off. Julie accommodated that request and removed them. Shortly after that, Ana also requested to Julie that she too wanted her training wheels off.

Now THAT'S ambitious!

KEIYH

Unrelated observations and over-hearings...

I think that Lysol needs to re-think a little their pitch for the hands free soap dispenser. I saw a commercial for this product and the pitch was that the hands on soap dispensers are laden with germs and that the hands free keeps those germs off your hands since you're not touching them directly. The way I see it, most people who use soap dispensers use them in this fashion. You wet your hands, you pump the soap, wash your hands (thus washing off the germs you just acquired) then rinse. Not wet 'em down, pump, wash, rinse and then go back and touch the soap dispenser again.

Yesterday was really nice outside (as is today) upper 70's and sunny... just great. Lyndsey's Easter thing (at pre-school) was yesterday. Afterwards it was time for lunch. Hopped in the truck opened the sunroof and headed on out. We were sitting there waiting in the drive thru with sunshine pouring in... and apparently burning the girls... when there was a request from the back... "Dad... we're hot... can you turn off the sun?"

Also yesterday, Jake came home with a cabbage plant. Not too sure as to the why, but we have a cabbage plant to plant and tend. He said that we can make mom some salad... I said that they (salads) aren't generally made with cabbage, but told him we could make cole slaw.

I wanted to comment on the most recent post posted by Julie and the curse of the Reuben... what she failed to include is the aftermath after having ingested said Reuben and the chorus of "OH MOM!"

Lastly the girls were talking this morning, and Lyndsey asked me how many more weeks until kindergarten? Than Ana asked me how many more miles until I go to school?

KEIYH

Hello... is there anybody in there?

Just nod if you can hear me... is there anyone at home?

The answer to that in a bit...

We wanted to take advantage of some things, like the kids being on break and Julie having Tuesdays off and our membership to the Museum of Science and Industry and a nice day and the fact that we'd be heading into the city allowing us to make some deliveries. We had Girl Scout cookies to deliver to Comer and Children's.

I know that I said that I could easily walk away from Children's and never ever have to go there again... except for delivering Girl Scout cookies. NOW I don't have to go back. It was tough for me to look at that building and not think about what transpired inside the confines of it. I didn't go inside, Julie did, but just making the drive and sitting outside was enough. I was seeing the windows (from the outside) that I spent many hours just sitting staring (and praying and thinking) out of. The windows along hallways that I waited and paced as I waited for Emmah's various scans and tests to finish. Windows that I spent hours alone nervously waiting on the procedures that Emmah had to endure and the windows with Emmah as she recovered from said procedures. It was hard for me to go to Comer too, but for an entirely different reason, one that I've already expressed previously in this blog.

Anyhow, it was Comer first, then the museum, on to Children's and then dinner to feed the walk weary.

By the time we made it to the museum after the Comer delivery it was approaching lunch, but the last thing we wanted to do was go right in and eat, so we went to a see a few things first eventually making our way to eat. Lunch was had and we pressed onward but not before a stop to the facilities.

If you've been a "regular" here at the blog you should know that there isn't much that is off limits to discuss. I always view it as reader beware... I'm not making you read this. Anyway, having said that, you should know that bodily functions are sometimes a favorite subject, after all, we all have them.

Now Ana is at an age that she's finally figured out that the toilet isn't just some seat in the bathroom (akin to the chair in the family room) and that's where we are supposed to "go". This age is quite the quandary in that when she's awake, she knows what to do, but napping is always a risk for wetting something... a blanket and the couch or a blanket and the carpet. So I try to make sure that she's in a pull-up before she drifts off in the afternoon. We also make sure that she's in one if we're going to be on the road. I know this sends a mixed message when she announces from the back that she has to go and we tell her that she can go in her pull-up. It always seems that the urgency for her need to use the potty is directly proportionate to how inconvenient is for us.

Example you ask?

Okay... we're on the road and there's nowhere to stop and she refuses to go in her pull-up. We're in the middle of the Celebration for Emmah at the school and same deal... refusal to go then too. On the flip side of that is we will be at home and I will have her in one because we're approaching the napping hours. She has full access to a toilet... two in fact... and for no other reason than being lazy, she pees. Drives us crazy.

What does any of that have to do with the museum... not too much really, but there was a moment during lunch that Ana needed to go... but more on that in a bit.

As we made our way around the museum, we made our way to YOU! The Experience exhibit. It's fairly interactive, for those who haven't experienced it first hand. Many things to see and do. One of the things that we stumbled upon was a game called Mindball.

Mindball is a game that, as it's name implies, you use your mind to play. You sit across from each other at a long table. On the table sits the "game". It consists of a tube with a ball in it and two "goal" circles. You sit down and put a headband with some electrodes on it and it's that headband that reads and measures your brain activity. The more relaxed you are, the better. You move the ball towards your opponent the more relaxed you are. In other words, the better you are able to shut it down mentally, better than your opponent, the better chance you have to move the ball to the goal. What it measures is Theta and Alpha brain waves, and it shows that activity on some monitors.

We watched several pairs of people go (literally) head to head. Some the ball just moved quickly to a goal, some it would start and stop and then reverse, some would go back and forth. Jake and Nick wanted to try their hand at this game as did Julie and I. After waiting, Jake and Nick were able to sit down and strap on. Let the game begin!

They sat down putting the headband on their heads, put their heads down the table and basically shut down their brains. Watching the monitors show the real time activity, it confirmed and explained a lot... as in why they are the way they are... as basically their respective Theta and Alpha brain waves were just short of flat-lines. The game started with the ball moving half way towards Nick, but then the ball stopped... and by stopped I mean STOPPED! (The technicians try to move things along by distracting them by making noises or talking to them. In some of the people, this would cause a big spike in the wave activity. In the boys, it barely registered as a blip) This how it stayed... until the worker/technician said that he needed to call it a draw cuz it was taking too long. He added that was the longest one that he's seen 'cept for a set of twins. Lights are on...

Then is was our turn (Julie's and mine) to sit down and strap it on. Before sitting down, I had a concern go through my brain as to whether or not the band was going fit around my pumpkin of a head. It did, but only on the last few strands of Velcro. So there we were... I knew secretly that Julie wanted to beat me... and she had to know that I was looking to beat her. I'm far more competitive than she is in general, but it's always something "special" when you're head to head with the old spouse... and I mean that from both sides. I play a fair game of boggle, but Julie more often than not prevails. She won't play chess with me. So we know and understand our limitations. This was going to be different though... this was a mind game. As Julie and I sit there, the technician prattles on about how a woman's brain has been scientifically proven to always be "on"... men on the other hand... well never mind. Let's just say that this explains A LOT between men and women. I think it's fairly obvious as to the reason that men have developed the ability to "tune out". Needless to say, and much to Julie's dismay, I won.

So they finally kicked us out at closing time and we made our way to Children's. Booooo! Then is was on to something to eat.

A favorite place of ours (Julie's and mine) was My Pie, but they closed the one on Clark the one that was literally blocks away from Children's. They moved to Bucktown... Damen near Fullerton. So we made our way over to there only to find no place to park and basically a carry out joint. This wasn't going to work... so it was decided to head on over to Connies on Archer. It was there (during conversation) that it came about the events that unfolded during that post lunch pit stop. Julie took the three girls to the family restroom and I stood outside the men's room while Nick and Jake did whatever they had to do. Julie proceeded to tell me that when Ana pooped, she (Julie) was shocked as to the size of said poop. See try as we might, our kids aren't slaves to fiber and pay the price from time to time pooping out clumps. This was the case with Ana this particular time. As she (Ana) stood there admiring her work... she couldn't help it notice and remark that it looked like a pine cone.

Looks like another artist in the making.

KEIYH

A young blonde conversation...

Today the girls are sitting/laying together on the couch and I am sitting on the other couch on the other side of the room. I'm half listening to them talk and I can hear Lyndsey and Ana conversing about what Rachael used to do when she was little. I'm thinking this should be good.

Then Lyndsey asks me what Rachael used to do when she was little. Not sure what exactly she's asking by asking that question, I say, "what do you mean?" Ana chimes in with, "like when I was little" and Lyndsey quips, "Ana, you're still little". Ana then turns to me and tries to explain what Lyndsey meant with her question by saying "like me when I was little yesterday dad". I then ask Ana then if she's not little today... "So you're not little today?"

"No."

I didn't realize it happens like that!

KEIYH

Kids... changing your perspective for a millennia

Ahhh... a lovely Saturday morning, sun is shining and the birds are singing... supposed to be near 50 today. Time to get outside in some way and enjoy it, but first breakfast.

A morning ritual of mine (when not in the hospital) was to make a breakfast smoothie. Speaking of morning rituals... we all have them. Some make coffee... some have a smoke... some do both. I think that for most of us, usually a stop to the terlet (as Archie Bunker sez) to take care of some biz is generally in order. So for the first time since getting home, I made a smoothie.

In addition to the other rituals... we umm... fart... or what my dad would used to call it when I was little, a breezer. I know... Anyway, we call a fart a fart in this house and well with it being the morning and all I uhh... popped one off while pouring out some smoothie while Jake was walking behind me. It prompted a "EWW" from Jake. Then as he's walking to get his cup (so I can give him a refill) he mutters... "I wonder if you could taste a fart?"

My first thought was why would you want to? In my entire life... least from what I can remember of all the 45 years... I've never had the thought as to the tasteability of a fart.

KEIYH